I'm excited - for the long weekend I'm going to Maryland to vist my college roomie and her husband and get to see their new house and I haven't seen them in a year and haven't I mentioned this already? I'm just really happy about it; the last time I saw Shalini I was still kind of shaky from all the louse stuff, and it makes me realize just how much happier and well-adjusted I'm feeling now in comparison, and I feel like I have a lot more to offer her, and my other friends - if nothing else, I'm certainly better company than I used to be!

Randomness: last night I went to Andi and Doron's to catsit (it was sweet; Luka slept with me all night long - she's as soft as a cotton ball) and when I got off the elevator, I was initially convinced I was on the wrong floor. While they've been away, sometime since Friday night, someone painted the door to their apartment minty green! No other doors on the floor have are minty green. I called Andi to let her know - they certainly didn't ask for a minty green door. How inexplicable!

(Boy, talk about a deep entry, eh?)

I just looked at my calendar and realized that this weekend will be the first weekend since November that Ben and I have spent apart. Well, okay, no wonder I've been feeling like I'm gonna be missing him! I don't think I realized that we'd spent that many weekends together so far. At least he'll be coming over Monday night when I get back from MD (he didn't want to wait until Tuesday, his usual night to come over after his violin lesson.. :-)

More lovey stuff: I still can't get over (and don't want to) all his many considerations, the way he is so delighted to do things for me, how appreciative he is of the things I do for him. (I love these small things: he's almost out of toothpaste at my place (we like different brands) and I went and bought a new tube for him instead of waiting for him to remember.) I made him copies of the keys to my apartment so he doesn't have to buzz when he comes over, and he can lock up on his way out, and he was so happy about it (I had lingering past bad-relationship fears that he would react like "well, what is this supposed to mean?")

(Funny, the key thing - when I moved in with the louse, it took him two months to get me a key to the outside door to get me into the building. I would have to wait for someone to let me in if he wasn't home to buzz me. Controlling much?)

Sunday morning Ben offered to go to Dunkin Donuts and get us coffee so I wouldn't have to go out in the cold (too bad he can't go to yoga for me tonight - it's freezing!) The other night Laika was sitting on my lap and I made an offhand comment to her, "too bad I have to go see if the shower's free, I don't want to kick you off!" and Ben jumped up to go check for me (three times!) so Laika could stay with me.

It is sometimes still so difficult to get used to these kindnesses, but I have to admit, it's getting easier and easier.

(Yesterday morning in bed, at 5:30, I gradually woke up to find Ben kissing my neck and touching me in marvelous ways and we had fantastic sex half-asleep and he told me after that he hadn't meant to start anything - he had just put his arm around me and it turned him on so much he couldn't help himself and let me tell you I am just eating it up, this torrent of desire he has for me!)

I commented to him the other day how much I appreciated how considerate he was and he gently protested that he wasn't that considerate, that he can be selfish sometimes - like he won't always give up his seat to the elderly on the subway, or he'll eat the last piece of pizza without asking, and after the soul-sucking soulless vampirism of the louse, I just had to laugh in delight to be loving someone so normal.